Category: Rabbinic Thoughts

PLEASE join us in an effort to clean the children’s section at West Park Cemetery on August 23 at 10.00.Since ancient times, it has been the custom to mark the grave with a stone or monument. After Rachel died, “Jacob erected a monument on Rachel’s grave” (Genesis 35:20). The predominant position of Jewish law was that if a baby did not survive for 30 days, it was as if the baby had not lived. The two major Jewish legal statements on which this custom is based are these: “We do not mourn for fetuses, and anything which does not live for 30 days, we do not mourn for it.” -Maimonides Mishne Torah Laws of Mourning 1:6.  “The infant, for 30 days, even including the full 30th day (if it dies), we do not mourn for it.” Yoreh De’ah 374:8. The reason for the limit of 30 days appears to derive from the fact that 30 days is the age at which we are commanded to redeem the firstborn. For the rabbis, this marked the point at which a baby became fully viable.The result of this ruling was that none of the practices of mourning was to take place if the infant was born dead or did not survive to the 31st day. Although the child was buried, there was no funeral per se, the grave was left unmarked, and the parents might never know where the grave was located. It was undoubtedly considered an act of kindness to the parents and the community, for without the restriction, families would have been in mourning almost continuously. Today the opposite is true. The tremendous sense of loss and the overwhelming need to grieve felt by the parents of an infant who dies before the 30-day benchmark does not go away just because halakah prevents the mourning rituals from taking place. The medical profession has now recognized that parents experiencing a baby’s death must face the loss, and be able to mourn. Parents are encouraged to see and touch the baby. It is recommended that the parents name the baby.Yet, most rabbis and most Jewish laypeople presented with this type of loss would be hard-pressed to know what to say, except to repeat the painful words, “There is no mourning for this child.” Jewish law has remained viable and relevant because each generation of interpreters applied the halakhah to its own time. Rabbi Stephanie Dickstein asks very important question, “What should be Jewish practice following the death of an infant who lives less than 31 days?” Rabbi Dickstein points out that the commonly held belief that there is no mourning for a child who does not survive to 31 days is not the only position found in Jewish legal literature. In Mishnah Niddah 5:3, we find this statement: “A one-day-old infant, if he dies, is considered to his father and mother like a full bridegroom,” and therefore the child would be mourned. In the Babylonian Talmud, Tractate Shabbat 136a, we read that the sons of Rav Dimi and Rav Kahana mourned for their newborns who died. (A Time to Mourn, A Time to Comfort)   – Rabbi Julia Margolis

Our Jewish tradition knows several fast days. Most known is for sure Yom Kippur, but Tisha b’Av, the ninth day in the month of Av, follows directly behind Yom Kippur in the awareness level. The day is regarded as the saddest day in the Jewish calendar and a day that is destined for tragedies that happened to the Jewish people in its long history. According to the Mishna, the core of the Talmud, five major catastrophes took place throughout the history on that day: On that day 10 of the 12 scouts, sent by Moses, returned with the negative report from the Promised Land, and God decreed that the whole first generation of the liberated Israelites was not allowed to enter the land. Both the first (586 BCE), and the second temple (70 CE) were destroyed on that day. During the Bar-Kochba uprising (132 – 135 CE), many Jews found refuge in the city of Betar, which was taken by the Roman army on Tisha b’Av, killing over 500,000 Jewish civilians. And finally, as a result of the Bar-Kochba uprising the Romans razed Jerusalem to the ground in 135 CE. Over time, Tisha B’Av has come to be a Jewish day of mourning, not only for these events, but also for later tragedies, such as the expulsion from Spain in 1492 (31.7.1492/9 Av 5252). Some communities use Tisha b’Av to mourn the 6,000,000 Jews who perished in the Shoah.In contrast to other streams, Progressive Judaism never has assigned a central religious role to the ancient Temple. Therefore, mourning the destruction of the Temple may not be particularly meaningful to progressive Jews. Even though, the day should be a day of reflection for all of us. During the Jewish history millions of Jews have been killed only because of being Jewish. On Tisha b’Av our thoughts are with those whose graves are unmarked and those whose names are long forgotten. May they have found refuge and eternal rest in the presents of the Eternal!Because of Shabbat, fasting starts this year in the evening of 25 July, and ends on Sunday 26 July after sundown. It is a tradition to read Eicha, the book of lamentation on Tisha b’Av. There will be a service of mourning followed by a study session with Rabbi Shaked at Beit Emanuel on 25 July at 18.00.Tu b’Av, the 15th Day of Av, is both an ancient and modern holiday. Originally a post-biblical day of joy, it served as a matchmaking day in the second Temple period and is described in the Talmud as one of the year’s happiest days: young Jewish women would dress in white and dance in the vineyards, and young bachelors would follow them in search of a bride. Tu b’Av was almost unnoticed in the Jewish calendar for many centuries but it has been rejuvenated in recent decades, especially in Israel. In its modern incarnation it is becoming a Hebrew-Jewish Day of Love, slightly resembling Valentine’s Day. Tu b’Av is celebrated this year on 31 July. May you have a wonderful day, filled with love, friendship, and happiness! – Rabbi Adrian M Schell

The message from IRAC Center: Israeli ultra-Orthodox Rabbi Freuchman Mandelbrot recently ruled that Jewish women are forbidden to use front-loading washing machines because they force women to bend over in provocative poses. The same rabbi ruled that (white) Jews are forbidden to play the black keys on pianos because it might lead to interracial sex.Soon after these rulings went viral online, people discovered that Rabbi Mandelbrot and his Facebook page are merely satire. The satire works because, in the eyes of both secular and religious Israeli Jews, Rabbi Mandelbrot is believable. He is a caricature of the very real sexism and racism that some ultra-Orthodox political leaders are advocating in the Knesset.The majority of Israelis are distancing themselves from this brand of Judaism. They are becoming more vocal in criticizing extreme positions like those catalogued in our recent report “Racism and Gender in Israel.” It is no wonder, then, that more Israeli feet are walking into our congregations and opting for an alternative way to express their Judaism.It is also no wonder that ultra-Orthodox politicians like Israeli Religious Services Minister David Azoulay and MK Moshe Gafni are lashing out against Reform Jews, accusing us of “stabbing the Torah in the back,” and of being “sinners” and a “danger to Judaism.” Azoulay and Gafni feel threatened. That’s why they are lashing out.What are we going to do? We’re going to make limonana out of these lemons.We’re going to take Prime Minister Benjamin Netanyahu at his word and accept his invitation to participate in “roundtable discussions” between the leadership of the non-Orthodox Jewish denominations in Israel and members of the government.We’re going to spread the message of URJ President Rabbi Rick Jacobs, who said during a radio interview in Israel “Every day we stand up against the delegitimization of Israel while members of the Israeli government delegitimize Reform Jews.”We’re going to rise above the name-calling and negativity. We’re going to continue our work to make Israel a more inclusive, egalitarian and democratic country.- Anat Hoffman, Executive Director of the Israel Religious Action Center.

This evening, I am not going to share with you some regular thoughts on our Torah portion of this Shabbat. We will learn more about it tomorrow morning, especially from our Bat Mitzvah Jessica.What I would like to share with you is a deep impression I have made this week at a seminar that was organized by Shalom Bayit, and I am very thankful that I had the chance to join the seminar.The topic of the seminar was ABUSE; physical, mental, and sexual abuse. I know, this is not a usual topic for a Friday night sermon, but please bear with me for a moment.The people on the podium, as well as two survivors shared with us not only facts, numbers and statistics, we can read everywhere; their words lead us into a sea of an emotional abyss, which they had to face personally or as counsellors professionally. They shared with us the brutality of any abuse, and how this affects and changes the life of any victim forever.Even though we don’t like to hear it, we must hear the following: The abuse of women, men, girls and boys has been happening also in the “Jewish world”, it has been happening in our progressive one, too. We need to hear it, because it happens, and can happen everywhere at any time to everyone.I don’t want to shock you, but I have to, because we need to be aware of it. Awareness is the first step to change the situation, and to help the victims.Our Torah portion for this week is mentioning again the Ner Tamid, the eternal light or flame that once was lit in the sanctuary on the altar of the tabernacle and the temple, and has now become a symbol of God’s presence in every synagogue.Some of you might (hopefully) remember that I talked about the eternal light just some weeks ago, because it was also a topic in Parashat Tetzaveh. On that Shabbat I shared with you the idea that the Ner Tamid is not only this light above the Aron HaKodesh, the Torah Ark, that represents God’s presence in our Synagogue, it is also the divine spark that is imbedded in every human being. This eternal light is nourished by our love and care for another human being. It is the love of a parent, a partner, of a child, of a friend, or even a stranger that feeds this eternal light in us.But, let’s be reminded that this light is very fragile, it can be easily diminished or even worse, it can be extinguished very easily by abuse. This light needs our joined protection. We all, as individuals, and as part of this community have a high responsibility to keep this light shining, bright and un-touched.If we learn that one person, only one, is in danger, or even already abused, we need to act immediately. As Rabbi Goldstein said – there is a zero tolerance policy towards abuse.I have much more in my mind, I would like to share with you – the words of the survivors have impressed me heavily, and I know this is not the right place to share these experiences. But I think we should be having a seminar on this topic in the nearer future in order to give you all more information – first hand.In the meantime, I would like to make you aware what you can do, if you learn about abuse, or if you need help.We have pamphlets from Shalom Bayit in the foyer of the synagogue. They help you to understand more what abuse is, how you can recognize it, and how you can help or get help. Please get them.As I said before, awareness is the first step to help the victims. Abuse happens, and the victims need our help. This synagogue is a safe zone. If you need help, or if you know of someone, who needs help, you will find it here.Shabbat Shalom

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